I have been blogging on and off for about seven years now. I started blogging when I truly started understanding how little I fit in this strange society of ours. It was a means to share a bit of myself while not having to really mix with the “rabble”. I never expected to become some sort of internet sensation, but I did believe that there were enough folk out there open to my view of the world that I might gather a small following. Over those years, much has changed … both with the world, and within myself. In both cases, it has not all been for the better. My disillusion has grown as the emotional climate of the human world has plummeted, resulting in me basically shutting myself off from society in the last year or so. I would love to blame this on the various evil regimes that seem to be in ascendance, but these are really simply the anvil that broke the camel’s back, when a simple piece of straw was sufficient.
I am mentioning this to give some perspective for today’s post. I rejoined the A to Z challenge for one reason: to reengage myself with … well … myself. I have no delusions of suddenly building up a following when seven years and nine-ish blogs has failed to do so. I really don’t expect ANYONE to view my posts (which does not mean I don’t appreciate those who DO visit). I am simply trying to remind myself of what I value in life, and once again start enjoying the passions that have run dry for me in recent months. The depths my spirit have fallen to are less depression and more a stripping away of a lifetime of delusion and truly seeing myself and the whole of existence in a much clearer light. Unfortunately I stripped away a little too much.
So I am returning to the world of creation and an appreciation of beauty. This is the world I long for, and the one I lost connection with. I have to lose those connections to the world that do nothing but drain me … at least until I relearn how to control the drain. In the spirit of this, I am learning all sorts of new things, even as I am relearning old things. I create as the creative spirit guides me. The last couple of days I have been working on a bit of computer animation. The idea of it developed even as the poem that was my last post did. I initially was planning on having this video with the poem, but it became more elaborate as I worked on it, as well as a teaching tool as I truly start learning the ins and outs of the software I am using. So, in the spirit of the letter “M” I offer this little Movie, which is essentially a visual representation of my recent poem. Enjoy!